Dear Abby: Nobody shows up for me the way I show up for them

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A reader asks for advice on how to deal with the fact that they always show up for people, but don't get the same energy in return.

A reader asks for advice on how to deal with the fact that they always show up for people, but don't get the same energy in return.

Somehow I became the go-to person for everyone in my family -- siblings as well as parents. I have the means, and for decades, I have been happy to help. I recently lost a brother, and I assumed the people I’ve been there for would be there to support ME.failed. Two didn’t show up at all, and two came and left so fast my head spun. It was a two-part ceremony. My gathering was the first. I was so hurt I didn’t want to go to the second gathering, but I wanted to honor my brother, so I went.

Now I’m hurt and upset, and I have no family to turn to. Honestly, it’s nothing new, but I think I’m so hurt because I feel this is the end of family functions forever. What do you think? --I am sorry for your loss. Because you have been the family rescuer and in return were treated with disrespect and indifference, you have every right to be upset. I hope that in the future you will begin to develop relationships with people who show some reciprocity.

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