Dear Annie: I hope I pass before my husband so I don’t have to deal with my stepdaughter and her motherDEAR ANNIE: When the time comes -- hopefully I pass before my loving husband and faithful partner of nearly 25 years, but if not -- I could use a few words of advice as to how to deal with my estranged stepdaughter, her bitter mother and her young children who I’ve never met due to an unresolved falling out many years ago.
I pray I go first, but in case I do not, how would you suggest I deal with this and them as little as possible so my focus can be on grieving the loss of my precious husband? We are both in our mid-70s and it’s difficult not to think of these things. Thank God my two adult children are normal and supportive. -- Distraught Over What Could Be a Disaster
Having a support system, including your children, friends and perhaps a counselor, will give you people to lean on in the event of your husband’s death. Preparing for these scenarios now will allow you to safeguard your right to grieve as needed and honor your husband’s memory in a way that reflects your mutual wishes.