‘I'm being taken advantage of by my own husband’: I pay all the bills and gave the down payment for our home, and all he does is buy stuff and contribute to his 401(k)

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'I’m being taken advantage of by my own husband. I pay all the bills and gave the down payment for our home, and all he does is buy stuff and contribute to his 401(k).' The Moneyist weighs in:

I have been married for almost 10 years. When my husband and I were first married, he convinced me to stop working after the first year or so, which I regret.

We found a home that we loved, but he would not put me on the mortgage, saying my credit wasn’t good enough. Yet I made the down payment, paid closing costs, paid for the actual move, paid the final bills at the old house, bought furniture for the new house, and supported us for the first two months.

As luck would have it, our home value has increased dramatically, so we decided to take out a small home-equity loan for a couple of repairs. I’m angry because I pay all the bills, aside from his personal truck and credit cards. He contributes 11% to his 401. I also have to pay $10,000 a year in income tax because of being self-employed, and he will only contribute $2,000 to that amount.

Am I in the wrong here? At 52, I feel like I should be able to have my own financial profile and benefit from my hard work instead of just boosting his credit and finances. He thinks I’m being ridiculous. What do you think?Dear Wife, You need a ledger and a lawyer. In that order. It’s unusual for one person to be on the mortgage while both parties are on the title deed. But that’s the good news. The mortgage is legally his responsibility to pay. However, it’s in both your interests to make sure you don’t default, both for your credit scores and obviously to avoid the bank foreclosing on your home. You want to avoid being on the mortgage and not being on the title deed.

 

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Put Ol yo Troubles In Jesus’s HANDS!

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