Patrick Freyne’s Irish festivalgoer guide: 11 kinds of peole and things to avoid

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Electric-Picnic News

All-Together-Now-Festival,Kylie-Minogue,Summer-Of-Family

If you’re heading for Electric Picnic, All Together Now or Beyond the Pale this summer, beware

One perspective: For some time we have known humankind is not at the centre of the cosmos but lives, in fact, on an outlying spiral arm of just one galaxy in an infinite universe. Cosmologically speaking, we live in Donegal.Jiggy-Wiggy and the Prunes, Count Bopula Greeves, Funk Cassidy and the Ripe Smell, Wibble, The Trippy Capybara, $&%?!, Pope Pius II, Ikea Shelving Unit 100 x 136cm, Flump, Armadillo Delicious, Loose Goose and the Goslings, Bryan Gosling, Small Simon*.

“You need to take things seriously, fly straight and study for your exams or ChatGPT will take your jobs!” “Raaagh!” say the horde.“Get out of my tent, please, Steve. No, I don’t work for the CIA, I know your name because your friends have written it in marker on your forehead. Yes, I realise that you’re sleepy, but this is my tent and I’ve never met you before. That does sound difficult, Steve, but Vietnam happened a long time ago, and I don’t think you’re old enough to have fought in it.

 

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